I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.