1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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