im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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