Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
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