Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.

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(207): View more from Maine

at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally

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(205): View more from Alabama

It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.

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(816): View more from Missouri

he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(775): View more from Nevada

he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family

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(585): View more from New York

High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.

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(210): View more from Texas

I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.

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