So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
