your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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