He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
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then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
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Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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