marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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