Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize