So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
send nudes
from the living room?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
