how can u be prego again
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
