Buhtt sex?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
