I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
wow bdsm is so cute
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
