They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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