Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
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