So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
tonight lets celebrate not being married
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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