as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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