I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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