So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Randomize
