Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize