Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
