She's JV to your varsity
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
