Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize