when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
