I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i think i just lost a toe
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
