carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
