3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
