This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize