Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
