So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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