She said her name was "party"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
