well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
