Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
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Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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