sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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