i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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