It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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