every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
