i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
