So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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