I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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