sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
