its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
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We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
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Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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