I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize