I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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