I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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