You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I think im going to throw up on grandma
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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