Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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