wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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