office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
