I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Randomize